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Bereavement

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lastlib

(24,988 posts)
Fri Feb 11, 2022, 12:22 AM Feb 2022

My nephew passed away three days ago. [View all]

In 1994 he was a typical teenager, looking for his own path, when he started experiencing dizzy spells and blackouts. His teachers thought it was drugs, until a medical check revealed a cancerous brain tumor pressing against his cerebellum. Surgery removed most of the tumor, but the day after it, he experienced cranial bleeding, and he underwent an emergency surgery. These operations left him nearly deaf, partly blind in his left eye, and with serious balance and coordination problems. He lost most of the use of his left hand (he was left-handed), and radiation and chemo therapy caused skin damage, near-total hair loss, and burns to his esophagus, which affected his speech. He went on total disability, and has never been able to hold a job or otherwise have a normal life. He has lived with his mother (my sister) all his life. She has been divorced from his father since 1992, but he had been somewhat involved with my nephew's life since the divorce.

Last October, his mother died of kidney failure. His father died eight years ago. My niece was trying to find a new place for him to live, and sell mother's house, but without success to this point. Earlier this week my niece was trying to contact him, but he didn't answer phone calls or texts. Her husband went to the house to check on him, and found him dead. Medical examiner preliminarily says it was "natural causes," (at this point, I'm not sure what that means) but will have to investigate further.

Now, I have to tell my 94-year-old mother, who four months ago, lost her second daughter, that her oldest grandson has passed away. I know this is going to devastate her, but it will have to be done. I guess I'm asking this group to cross your fingers that I can break this news to Mom without crushing her. It's going to be ugly.

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So, so sorry. Enter stage left Feb 2022 #1
I'm so sorry for your loss! DUgosh Feb 2022 #2
I'm so very sorry, lastlib. brer cat Feb 2022 #3
My heart is with you. MuseRider Feb 2022 #4
I am so sorry, lastlib. sheshe2 Feb 2022 #5
. lastlib Feb 2022 #18
Not the natural order of things..... OAITW r.2.0 Feb 2022 #6
Ugh so sorry for everyone IbogaProject Feb 2022 #7
Your nephew and your mom people Feb 2022 #8
I am so sorry. LoisB Feb 2022 #9
My deepest condolences on your horrific losses... Moostache Feb 2022 #10
I'm so sorry vercetti2021 Feb 2022 #11
.... UpInArms Feb 2022 #12
Must you tell your Mother about your nephew's death? NewDayOranges Feb 2022 #13
She was pretty close to him emotionally. lastlib Feb 2022 #19
Okay. I just thought that if your Mom does not NewDayOranges Feb 2022 #20
Such a difficult time for you, my condolences. JudyM Feb 2022 #14
Peace Gilbert Moore Feb 2022 #15
((lastlib)) blm Feb 2022 #16
Deepest Condolences SheltieLover Feb 2022 #17
My sincerest condolences to you and your family, lastlib. hippywife Feb 2022 #21
How are you doing? How is your mother ChazII Mar 2022 #22
We're doing okay. lastlib Mar 2022 #23
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