Bereavement

If she wasn't mad at me, perhaps she could have convinced him to go. I have no idea why she suddenly dropped me as a friend, as I have treated her as nothing but a friend and family, nor have I done anything differently.

I texted her to check up on him, begging her to do so, even if she was mad at me, she should not take it on any one else. That perhaps she could convince him, since he listens to her more than he does to me. She didn't do so, on the weeks leading up to this, and to this day, I have no explanation.

I understand that I have no fault on all of this intellectually. I still feel like a catalyst though since I know that she was what he was thinking about during his last moments before getting struck by the seizure that brought him to the hospital.

I know it is on her, and I am sincerely hoping that she is doing well.
We drew so much comfort and strength from one another these past two and a half years, as she was my partner in many many things.

I will get past this, and I have worked that out in my mind, I guess I just need time and rest.
I can't wait for November.....