Veterans

who is like a crack addict. He comes over to our house regularly and points a gun to our heads to get money for his fix. That's rather convincing and he's out of control, so we comply.

Thing is, his dealer keeps upping the price for his junk and there is no end in sight. At some point we won't be able to maintain his habit.

Are there any unnecessary public programs, (since they are all deemed to be of no value) that we can cut or scrap to help pay for these incredibly sexy, expensive destructive things? It's our duty, it seems.

Uncle did say he would also protect us from all the goons he imagines in his crazed, paranoid world of enemies and addictions, power and control freaking. That's a pretty big monkey he has on his back and he has a GOP tattoo.

Strange stuff! Oh, is that Uncle knocking on the door again?