Mental Health Support

i sure wouldn't have any guilt or anything about music. i have had some bad times where a short list in my headphones was something to hold onto.

and i totally know the whole off the rails bit. i had a spate of time when i was unemployed and the first thing i had to do every day was to scoop the poop in my dog run. at the time it was the most unbearable weight.
if the stuff that you are hoarding is worth anything, try to get rid of it. get an estate sale person in there, and sell, sell, sell. you will feel lighter. i know the feeling of being trapped in a "socially unacceptable" home. it is something that burned a hole in my self worth for a long time when my kids were small. (and their's too, no doubt.) i have a nice house now that is still messy, but not to where i wont let people in. it is something that is really right in the middle of it all for me. just something that popped out at me for that reason, i am sure.

and keep trying on the meds. it can take forever. i have a good ad, finally. it doesn't make me happy, but sure allows me to be happy about the good things that i have.

good luck. keep trying. kiss the grandkids.
and come back when you need us.