The DU Lounge

I know it's hard. Beating up on oneself is natural--you failed to be SUPERWOMAN! My Mom tried, and eventually had to go the road you are now on. My Dad, who oftentimes seemed unable to ambulate, could (in the blink of an eye) disappear from the rural property Mom and Dad shared with me. Once, when an hours-long search, with neighbors and authorities called in for help, found him climbing the fence bordering the nearby interstate, the decision was made. Had Dad actually hitched a ride from a thoughtful driver, we might never have seen him again. He no longer new his address, his phone number, or any other contact information. And he didn't carry identification with him!

I'm now the age Dad was when we placed him in a care facility. That's a frightening thought, isn't it? But even though we all think we'll somehow KNOW when it's our time, as mind and body slowly fail, it's only others who can understand that we no longer have that ability to KNOW. My advice: (1) Don't beat up on yourself; (2) Do what you can, when you can for and with him; and (3) Treasure your memories.