General Discussion

Of course I agree with her 100%. I have always hated holidays because they come with expectations in our culture which for years made me feel like there was something wrong with me. But like her, at mid-life I had a huge reckoning with myself and realized that most of what I had done in the past for the holidays I did because I thought it was unfair to my childen and then husband to deprive them just because I could care less about Christmas. My ex was brought up with a lot of material things but no love and I was brought up in a nonreligious household, so there was no going to church or talking about the baby Jesus. We were poor and there were a lot of us, so we got one or two small gifts if that, maybe pj's or knee socks, and by the time you turned 12 you no longer got gifts. It's just how it was. The tree and the lights and shiny bulbs and candy canes on it were the most exciting thing for me.

Coincidentally, today I made a trip to Salvation Army and dropped off a small box of ornaments and a mixing bowl with Santas on it that someone gave me for a gift and I've never used. I mostly like to celebrate the winter solstice and my decorating is minimal and winter/nature themed. There are evergreen branches and red candles on my mantle and a prelit fake birch tree. I will not be buying a single present since my family of origin all live out of state and all of us are old and nonmaterialistic, and my two adult children are middle aged. Only one lives nearby and she can't be bothered to visit me because "we're so busy" (the disease of their generation).

I consider myself at the tail end of my life and all the things she talks about are so true. However, the deep conversations are hard to come by these days since, at least in my experience it's hard to find people who want to have deep conversations. Everyone seems so superficial these days. A quote that I read in the past that has stayed with me is "stop the glorification of busyness". Ever run into someone and say to them, "Gee, i haven't heard from you in awhile. How are you?" and their answer is "Oh, I've been soooo busy." They aren't introspective enough to even delve into trying to understand what they want their life to look like.

Thanks for the video. I'll have to look for more from her. Seems like she's a kindred spirit.