Bereavement
Related: About this forumToday marks 8 months since my dear friend AndyS died.
It is also the day that the moon is in first quarter. I took the photo you see here in his honor. He taught me so much about life, love and photography. It is a debt that can never be repaid, nor would I want to.
8 months seems like 8 years. Memories are slippery things; some days they're bright and vivid; other days they hardly register. Some days I can laugh and some days I am so down that it seems as though I'll always be there.
But very slowly, I am getting used to the fact that he's gone and I must cope without his wisdom.

MontanaMama
(24,765 posts)Where does time go? 8 months.
CaliforniaPeggy
(157,075 posts)I wonder too where the time goes. And it never returns.
blm
(114,790 posts)CaliforniaPeggy
(157,075 posts)Permanut
(8,618 posts)CaliforniaPeggy
(157,075 posts)It came from the heart, where my best writing lives.
wendyb-NC
(4,740 posts)I am so sorry for your loss, he made a difference in your life, and I venture a guess to others. He sounds like someone who's light will continue to shine onward, in who he was and the gifts he shared. Peace be with you.
CaliforniaPeggy
(157,075 posts)He always told me how much he loved my moon shots. For a long time, he wouldn't post his own in the Photo Group, because he felt that was my bailiwick! Amazing guy.
He made a huge difference to me and to the Photo Group as a whole. I hope that his light will shine on. He had many gifts!
I appreciate your lovely thoughts so much!
MLAA
(19,818 posts)You are continuing his legacy!
CaliforniaPeggy
(157,075 posts)He was so far advanced in so many fields that require vast knowledge that I could never hope to even come close to helping continue his legacy.
All I can really do is remind people that he lived and loved and always worked to increase our awareness of life.
LoisB
(13,604 posts)CaliforniaPeggy
(157,075 posts)LoisB
(13,604 posts)young_at_heart
(4,066 posts)I think when we reach our "golden years" life becomes deeper and more precious. Your statement about feeling so down that you'll always be there spoke to me tonight. I'm at that place now, trying to figure out the best way to manage my husband's cancer. I'm struggling to cope and I take inspiration from you and others here at DU. I joined when I felt outrage with George W and the GOP (under a different name), but I mostly just read what everyone is saying. As a fellow Californian, I have always enjoyed your interesting posts and especially your great photographs!
CaliforniaPeggy
(157,075 posts)Glad I can inspire you. I'm not always down, of course, but when the date rolls around when I lost him, then I can't help it.
I am glad you enjoy my photos! Knowing that the things Andy taught me and that made me a better photographer helps me cope with the loss.
Doodley
(12,099 posts)CaliforniaPeggy
(157,075 posts)Your lovely words make me feel less alone. Andy was truly magical in photography, writing and in life!
Doodley
(12,099 posts)time looking at your photo and saw things I have never seen before and felt things I hadn't before. I am very sorry for your loss.
CaliforniaPeggy
(157,075 posts)Sorry I didn't see your response till today, when I was on my phone.
He sure did have a huge impact in my life, and for that I will always be grateful. He saw things in me that I'd never seen.
And I appreciate your telling me that you spent a long time looking at my photo, where you saw and felt things you hadn't before. Those are remarkable responses! You've got great sensitivity and I hope it will always help you.
Thank you again for your wisdom and your insight.
proud patriot
(102,587 posts)CaliforniaPeggy
(157,075 posts)Rubyshoo
(1,959 posts)CaliforniaPeggy
(157,075 posts)Grumpy Old Guy
(4,407 posts)We could always count on his wisdom, experience and kindness. He left us way too soon.
CaliforniaPeggy
(157,075 posts)He brought so much clarity and joy and meaning to all of us. I feel the loss very keenly.
I'm so glad you came by tonight.
Bundbuster
(4,018 posts)and thoughts & remembrances for AndyS.
....
....
CaliforniaPeggy
(157,075 posts)I know Andy would want me to be happy . . . but how can I be when he was so much a part of that?
Thank you for understanding! It really helps. His life was truly worth remembering . . .
electric_blue68
(27,467 posts)It's been about 15 yrs now for one of my longer friendships about 30+ years.
We had a lot of similar interests. Besides hanging out at many, many rock concerts w others good friends; we shared love for art, crafts, Indian food, science fiction, and 👍 liberal politics, and more.
I think of her alot, bc there's much to remind me about her. You're just 8 months in. It's a big absence.
Bit by bit.
CaliforniaPeggy
(157,075 posts)I think you're onto something when you talk about society doesn't get the loss of a dear friend. I didn't lose a spouse or a sibling.
He was just a friend.
And he was central to my life! We hit it off from the start. How do you explain that? I never could. As you said, it's a big absence.
Thanks so much!
electric_blue68
(27,467 posts){hug}