Sarah had been enduring an illicit construction for years in her own home, yard and street for 14 years. It effectively rendered her own resources worthless while enriching and enlivening the lives of people Sarah was used to privately refering to as “some total creeps, douchebags or at best total fucking randoms”.

Sarah was not an unreasonable woman. But she failed to see how enriching “some total creeps, douchebags or at best total fucking randoms” somehow could be construed as a social or professional duty.

Unsurprisingly the “total creeps, douchebags or at best total fucking randoms” had different views.

Sarah’s primary feeling on hearing the election results was one of relief that the govt that had been in office for the past 10 years was finally out of office.

She felt it was imperative that it be communicated to the incoming new state govt that this illicit construction will not survive and it should be shut down and dismantled immediately in ways that were not: 1) exploitative, 2) unsafe to Sarah and 3) the details all preserved for due process that would require Sarah being formally involved at last after a delay of 14 years and 8 months wrt accepting that Sarah was not open to anything started in such a way.

Sarah was not a mean-sprouted or dictatorial woman. All she wanted to convey was that if she went into your homes and lives and made this big a nuisance of herself, unless something was seriously wrong with you, you would not be trying to shill some fucking awful studies and postmortems of an abomination that should not exist.

Sarah was not cornucopian. She was merely outnumbered by the kinds of peope she had avoided all her life not seeing them as evil, bullying etc so much as empty with a bottomless hole inside that looked like the least interesting thing to keep staring at with dull loathing.

Sarah was overtly ruminating that Tuesday morning:

“This stuff is on my mind all the time now.
I am going to file some complaints related to machines.

As for those loathesome agents. LLMs are grating.

Those things are downright dangerous. You don’t want stuff built and trained by those guys with the “move fast, break shit” mentality training mindless things that make autonomous decisions without any knowledge of the real world.

And train them on a large enough group of controlling humans as you said elevatedlanedem..

Prof French - incidentally also the name of the protagonist in Inspector French’s books - is a very senior scientist and busy, but my last mentor was pretty elite and I have no idea what he is upto.

The only computer scientist I have seen who I trust to not be a human who hallucinates is Prof French.

And really, given Suckerturd’s sheer nuisance value, I feel Prof French should help those of us with radioactive data who clearly signal that open web or not, there is an academic code of conduct and it is a bad look to use data from women who outright dislike you if you are someone as loathesome as lsay Brian Keegan who wrote a noxious thing attacking Prof Green. I get that guy. He I bet likes gratitude. People he can lord it over patronizingly. Brainless ass…

Other scientists themselves fired or gatekept over decency could only help badly off people, but Prof French is a bridge to nails on chalkboard types. He must be invested in the kind of future where alarming MeToo-BLM-working class rage hell downstream is averted without disdaining the screwed over. That would require that those guys are checked.

I am not so resource depleted as to see no investment in a stable society and I cannot see that depleting my resources further would help anyone but jerks.

The experimentation I see where I live I am preparing to take the police and other authorities in the future personally. But this up and down has no future- peaks and valleys rather than plateaus.

It is useless to expect emancipated women used to democracies to go “i lost..awwwww”.

Otoh strategically, the “wins” ..what a painful way to think ..it is like learning a new and brainless language.

And sadly you pick it up and it can’t possibly work except…
The most powerful piece of arsenal those types have is finding some total random who says daft crap online to then represent as “the left”. Impossible to defend worldviews you don’t have..

I have never had to think like this. Dredging out stuff from one’s unconscious..which anyway changes.

I think free women learn to reject manipulation and strategies people who had to be subservient to these guys presumably had to employ. It never sits quite right to have to be scheming adjacent. Otoh it is not yuck a “winning strategy” to from a lower power position to go out guns blazing.

I am from a rare matriarchal community and to have to grovel to people I dismissed all my life no matter how much money or power they have as “daft”. That is not entitlement though. It is automatic to not notice people who can in no way be a part of one’s life and whom one mostly just avoids collisions with and reports to authorities some day.

To represent assertive women as wanting to encroach into those guys’ territory rather than merely defend one’s own entirely with no compromise ever is cunning.

These guys are very good at exploiting images of embattled humans to destroy society.
We have a slim palette of tools and they are under constant attack.

Prof Lecun can be negotiated with because he is a decent man I am pretty sure. Its somehow offensive to be female and reduced to scheming. So regressive. I suppose doing it openly assuages one’s pride a little..

They don’t seem to have a real survival drive. Money, reputation curation etc is not survival. I have learnt to read a type of mind - it exists in some vestigial form in all human minds to the extent that without extensive training, those of us who are sensitive understand other human minds. Where there is stuff it is impossible to respond to and stuff you can work with to make your own life minimally grating going forward.

I find them counter-intuitive. I was the lab fuck-up and there is nothing worse than going to your pi and the look you see in people’s eyes when you show up having broken something again. Most mortals have done that at least once. A class of people in stem to whom the cringe associated with breaking things having died to be replaced by “oh i can just buy my way ahead and cover my tracks”..

And this is about human nature so with smooth efficiency learning to manipulate humans to less noisily screw people over..

In this context people feel gratitude when they actually feel it unbidden. Gratitude is not necessarily the most fun emotion. It sprouts up unbidden. So many things cannot be forced. For humans those are hard won insights over a life time. It is not a script.

In threatening situations I suppose Fight-Flight-Freeze-Fawn is activated and eventually presumably it is just fight.

Reputation curation and “being on the right side of history” following the cues of people who gloss over errors and exploit mobs is silly.


On a slow timescale these guys eventually scarily learn the surface part

That won’t last and I thought these guys are all about long term.
A fascinating conundrum. Those guys are fascinating. I never had to think about them before. It is degrading as it reverts to

I see a lot of concealer female anger I can decode. These machines are mostly a nuisance. Prof Lecun would understand. He is actually brilliant and being European probably has a well rounded education. I think reading lightweight crap like Freakonomics (I assume they read that stuff..Bill Gates’ reading list is very telling.
I look at these posts later when it is not strategic “warfare” (:facepalm .
Lol..
It is not an adversarial simulation when it is people you actually hate who don’t get that warfare doesn’t benefit either of us.
Poverty, stuff and power dynamics are complicated when people are above subsistence level.

When you have engaged in a war of aggression against your neighbor by stealing their life (john naughton is not always reliable but he got that. Data is not oil. It is people’s lives and an eternal permacrisis).
I felt relief when I saw Prof Lecun. Someone who is not drunk on power and ego to the point of lackiny all survival instinct and thinking like Alex Kaarp that recruiting working class men as pawns..Yeah good luck with that.
Always a mistake to misunderestimate the intelligence of anyone but scammers.
Scammers are stupid.
Elite scammers learn fast but at the core it is still a scammer who can only read that part of the human mind.
I can read (as a neutral party in most culture wars that don’t involve noise pollution..) the part of the mind tied with thought terminating cliches that affect all and disable people when sanity is needed.
These ruminations always make one feel more or less like an ass as they are contemptuous.
Except they are not and these guys..
Hmmmmm
Warfare. Nothing wrong with warfare as long as you don’t lose.”

These exercises made Sarah feel like an outmanoeuvred fool.
No one likes looking like an over obvious fool. And yet sometimes ..
Sarah on the whole remained unsure if she was mostly a fool or reasonably intelligent.
But a lot of fairly unintelligent humans seemed to be coasting on the kind of confidence that Sarah found..it was not true that you needed intelligence to succeed in an Idiocracy.
Lack of principles seemed more like the survival strategy. And a mediocre faux adult adversarial strategy that veered between exulting in various new and brainless things while insisting it was utopian to not be as crass and inert as.

It was distasteful and dangerous work.
Sarah knew manipulation, mockery doesn’t work. That South Park’s Tsst had
Sarah thought that the most meaningful thing one could train populations that were this far gone to acquire is the cringe that comes from breaking things? No that had no sophistication nor did time wasting.

Perhaps the sense of satisfaction that comes from not breaking things - a universally pleasant feeling.
The only real success of a largely chequered career Sarah had ever dealt with was not breaking shared instrumentation.
Such things could not be scaled up etc.

But a proof of concept template that is robust and reinforced can first be used to stop more errors. The type of error the most unpopular type of human causes of opening a door witj delicate instrumentation say like the human brain and out of kind of sad desire to be loved letting in swarms of untrained people while yipping about populism and gate keeping.

The career idiot’s assay to portray themselves as a thoughtful populist.
Sarah was thinking..

Last edited Tue May 5, 2026, 02:56 AM - Edit history (4)

Sarah’s thoughts were solidifying into a fairly universal KISS formula.
She thought of the kind of con that worked over and over. Sarah had a one of a kind mentor once and regretted that the sheer difficulty of science on top of the type of education privatization leads to had made it hard to meet her obligations in the traditional sense.

Sarah was on the whole deeply dubious that there was any real future in anything unconventional and non classical in any field, beyond the slow adaptation to new technologies that could work stably and sustainably.

But this was a social crisis. It was outright fraud to deceive people with syrupy assurances of the over obvious which was that many of our leaders, billionaires and media personages had made errors using the cato playbook via bullshit about a technology sector and in cornucopian ways.
Sarah thought of the scene in Dr. Who’s Smile where the unfrozen show up and start shooting at the Vardees.

It was not Vardees. Sarah stared in horror at human masses not used to thinking of themselves as screwed over at any depth surely and still paranoid.
Sarah understood it as a member of a majority group and not poor. In fact, Sarah had felt the same way occasionally making her receptive to the worldview. But it had always been tempered in Sarah’s case by a kind of neutrality which often made her feel like an outsider who mostly only felt any deep love for earth and its non-human biological life.

Sarah could herself be a negotiator picking up simple cues like “bread”, “safety”.
Screwed over people always asked “what about our egos if it is human nature”. The idiotic response was “life is not nature “.

A learned response for Sarah was that it was a scam to learn to copy the ways of those different from you in terms of power.
Uriah Heep was Dickens’ ugliest portrayal as a man deeply sympathetic to the screwed over.

Sarah had been foiled so often wrt the things she wanted that brought sustainable pleasure like work that was decent and hard but not impossible. Goldilocks it turns out was far deeper a parable than Sarah had realized.
Sarah had seen a very decent doctor who tried to do the right thing get attacked. Sarah saw it all the time. How even experts with good intentions can ended up ..it had confused Sarah who figured you needed something more than a blatantly fraudulent concern for animals from people who ate factory farmed meat, were okay with ventilation shutdown, but when it served them attacked a decent doctor who had spent his life in social service.
Perhaps the doctor was too decent a person.

Sarah thought again about Prof French and felt relief since Prof French was clearly a decent man who could still talk to people like SuckerTurd. That had to be a survival strategy that could weather this. Otoh SuckerTurd, a wretchedly bad at everything but scamming type had fired Prof French and doubled down on the stupidest decision a community of anti science technologists could make.
Sarah posted on a message board with decent and presumably embattled admins. Who wasn’t embattled these days?
Even the wealthy and powerful were. They were just too stupid to know it and were frustrating making calculations based on who you could get away with screwing over.

Sarah was at the boundary - a strawdohs type who understood the gun wielding types and sympathized with the screwed over and looked at the likes of SuckerTurd.

Sarah had tried several strategies which were mostly flight being a prudent woman. And later freeze and fawn. And finally the worst fight strategies ever..
Prof French was probably too bright to assume Sarah could be screwed over. Sarah would probably find a way for chickens to come home to roost. But going forward, Sarah who believed conflict should be minimal, send the correct message and not the wrong one (we are civilized humans here) and tap into the war wearied parts of all non sociopathic brains not the scammer/aggressor parts.

The brains of those who had not already caused Sarah immeasurable harm - the death of a parent, the loss of 15 years and health.
Those fuckers and their supporters need expect zero quarter. Sarah was very fond of her mom and of her brain and already forgave adequately. But not beyond a point where she assessed a type of solipsistic greed and indifference to the damage caused to others.
Sarah would find all the sources though that sounded douchily like revenge porn.
It wasn’t. It was recognition that someone who refused to get the loss of human life caused not by error, but by simply not giving s shit about anythint but money and garbage tech projects.

Perhaps it wasn’t like the decent doctor’s case. There was enough her to fulfill the bloodlust of various aggressive types and to support the worst off without in either case sanctioning a collection of worthless cottage industries.

You may not be able to save the world and the universe. But an in between achievable solution was on hand.
Sarah wished to warn off groups she had instinct sympathy for- the Green curmudgeons who kept away by fine honed instincts, other impassioned activists who are bright enough to get it, the glbtq community that again was bright enough.
That left the Darwin Awards candidates and Sarah wished to inform Prof French that while there was a Kenny from South Park quality to Sarah’s brain that found well intentioned stupidity or lack of selt awareness in those who could not be blamed for those things..hell Sarah was not exactly the brightest tool in the shed beyond knowing that she knew that but couldn’t remember how it felt when forced to explain the existence of such

Sarah saw a depressingly endless cottage industry and wished Prof French could champion the real thing in between so hard people give up and lightweight fluff that sold shitty books and talks.
Sarah saw the real left..much brighter and ever a crutch to Sarah when her brain simply couldn’t think of science and it was chalk and cheese and Prof French or Prof Chu seemed like the few in the opposition or on the bridge and wished..wished for some peace and quiet and for no one who did not deserve it to feel humiliated, degraded or screwed over where it was not purely imaginary and where it was to let such sleep without fear of mockery from catty morons.
————————————————————————-
Sarah had spent a long and wearying trek in minds she did not understand that she knew must exist.
And she came down to a simple, fast, safe, efficient strategy that guided her actions and worldview.
Sarah did not wish to lead or influence. Sounded like the worst idea ever.

But Sarah had a simple contract on offer. I don’t come into your spaces and make free with your stuff and don’t default on genuine obligations rather than non existent ones. I don’t get involved in your various wars.
I don’t like attention that too of this idiotic kind over lightweight drivel.

The same formula that lead her to think years ago “yeah I don’t know what this is but I want to exit it because it looks awful” and now I would add that it would look even lamer to try to take the clever position. But a parallel path to this circus explicitly spelling out. There are quieter people in your midst who do to small extents have their causes without (climate change, animal rights) and will use their “savings” sanely for their causes not your bullshit ones.
Leave such people alone where they leave you alone and keep their politics -the personal and impersonal separate; the literal and metaphorical separate and don’t mess with them when they like say Lina Khan and not some guy who goes and shoots Vardees or falls for the 3-body bs.
Otoh such people recognize that you handle human nature gingerly. And don’t ever again try this bs.
Self awareness is more powerful than you get.

You will never lay hands on my cold hard cash. I take after my dad more than I realize. Good. No man is a hero to his wife or offspring, but he is okay. And minus the slight tendency of the majority group male to whine it is useful. And sans any martyrdom, an incomprehensible worldview. Weren’t most martyrs burned and crucified etc. Why would anyone want that?
How on earth is prositution or robbery survival?

Those who get access largely seemed stupid enough to want it and to think that going and staring at piles or illicitly mined data and coming up with trickery to pretend use consistency..
Nature is so efficient unlike this painful hack like process.
Sarah was very fond of a Jewish journalist who had rescued her from the kind of corrosive misanthropy that poisons one’s insides.
Sarah’s fellow Greens were themselves outsiders. Sarah’s actually community rarely wanted to meet or know other people preferring to be disillusioned and bitter solo in private or where some joy was to be found in this hellscape in things like science also a solitary not shared activity. The few who made the news were not a good fit for Sarah as they emulated the Darwin Awards Candidates in the news and those who got things done had to worry about not being the sleazy type bts vs the decent type bts. And educators and social workers etc who were honest and competent (not as creeps think of competence but like my therapist..a humanist..and handles people without exacerbating).

All very complicated. Sarah was searching for sacrifices no one would miss except they were largely the successful and wealthy these days. And no one seemed to even mock them.
Another sign of who the press works for.

The press appeared to like to pick..Adam McKay is brilliant. And by assisting these systems a class of people who are universally disliked, the press, had lead to a nightmarish situation where their power (which had largely helped billionaires) was diluted but now misinformation dominated everything.
It all looked awful and diseased and all Sarah had to say was.

“It has been 15 years. I am not paying for this and I never asked you to pay for me.

So this will be aborted and complaints filed. Don’t double down in this case.
Don’t get mired with me:

I default to animal in human animal conflict and a solitary animal. Don’t bother. I learn from your failed gambits all the time.
You think I cannot guess what is beyond that screen?

I never intentionally misled anyone and have been clear throughout and nothing has changed.
You can do all this. But I want to disentangle my resources and I will push back and not be anyone’s pawn. I have my own explanatory strategies. I had a happy childhood and supportive parents.

Your pwns wither when examined. Your mobs look sad. This is not Vietnam nor any other situation.”
Sarah did feel it bloody well served all the douches who had discounted her all their lives right.
Prof French was bright enough to get that Sarah was no good as an ai or a bot, but only as the specific human animal she was.

Sarah had already established adequate contact with the embattled who mattered as only an asshole beats down the beaten down. And Sarah hoped to establish an equilibrium system with jerks explicitly as was implicit before this uncivilized time - don’t encroach and try to flip it or use bogus yimby populist scripts.
Sarah could handle “good guys” who wanted to be loved and remembered etc. Carlin was correct. There simply was not enough time to look in these many hideous eyes. It would be all you ever did anymore and at the expense of those you love or value more.
There must be a stupider version of the good guy the good guy could feel superior to by dint of leaving alone various women of uncertain temper who had no wish dominate some randoms.
There the good guy could feed his ego.
Hell Sarah accepted that bargain with Inspector French who probably thought she was a lazy, shallow idiot but accepted that there were even worse specimens than Sarah out there.
Something that had never bothered Sarah.

Dear God..this should never happen to my kind again. Greens who are also all the rest of your left.
———————————————
As Sarah pondered conflict lines prepared to get back to work and now with essential conflict - not seen any reason for cooperation except the things one overtly or generally engages with routinely.

Sarah had never had much use for a collective identity that was not more than humanist fellow feeling one on one and not snubbing people or bullying people. But kowtowing to mobs who make demands was not for Sarah.

Solidarity yes. Joining any damn cult no.
And besides what was wrong with most beyond some variation on grievances. Sarah’s non-human animals never got to whine even when factory farmed or burnt alive. Sarah would watch sourly as vegetarianism would always be the first casualty of supposed faith. Everything except the hard parts. Bah. Humbug.
But Sarah objected to characterisations adjacent to snobbery or coconuts etc. Idiots..always projecting. It was more that it was difficult to dissect these blobs of any kind into their constituent elements and it all looked awful.
Sarah was perhaps a bit ornery and a bit worn down but wanted to be characterized as Solanas or Unabomber adjacent (minus the violence, questionable mental stability and according to YL bigotry in the case of the Unabomber) and not various ill fitting smears.

Sarah yearned for a world where they could all keep doing the various awful things they seemed to enjoy, but not try to take any of Sarah’s stuff ever again or think its a joke where they already had. Sarah could not and would not find a creep or a cult. Sarah needed a functioning democratic society where women had all their old rights. Sarah already met her duties and wasn’t going to let bullshitters use her like this ever again and there would be pushback but Sarah wanted things to he clear.

If you are not already implicated or mired don’t force this and where you are this won’t work. As Sarah would, wait for due process, though fast and Sarah would like to not be alarmed while expecting a fast resolution now.
Sarah doesn’t try to meet her obligations so you can go around bullshitting and whining.
Don’t mess with Sarah. Sarah hadn’t meant to be brusque but one is civil to groups one doesn’t even belong in ..and then so on.

Phew..,

Sometimes society needs ornery, neutral, catladies who notice you all and try to calculate a future of the old pleasant coexistence where I don’t mess with your bullshit and you can stay out of my tiny lane where I sit around privately wondering what is wrong with all of you and hoping Sen Sheldon Whitehouse and Adam McKay get traction. Sarah never hogs as that doesn’t work. Sarah hates attention positive or negative because “No exit” was correct.

And now a loud cacophony to drown out the horror of silence plus no exit? It looked uncomfortable and unpleasant.
Call me by your name was correct. Book readers liked to hide instinctually making long explanations where which thing was important

But Sarah now understood that without intending to, people who lived collectively had little self awareness as cult validation was weird. The porcupine’s dilemma Sarah understood.
It seemed life required communication that would make simple things clear. It was hard to see much empathy in a species that kept eating factory farmed meat. It must be about in group virtue which would mean joining groups where aside from anti bullying and that less direct and overt..
All very complicated

But Sarah was getting closer to only one voice..her old voice inside her head. With merely an admonition to never again fall prey to Sarah’s follies: 1) being the type of person who stares at trainwrecks going “there but for the grace of”..funny how that went and far far worse 2) not being the “someone is wrong on the internet” argumentative type.
That was hell. No wonder this planet is in this mess.
That must be other people outside easy hard stuff like hard science. What a waste of life and a total rip off. Blood from a stone anyone.


Sarah sometimes daydreamt..mostly modern life seemed to make people lonely. Sarah was only lonely around humans. There were always books, cats, trees, birds..Sarah’s more gregarious family understood it and was never offended knowing that it was just how some people were and it didn’t connote mental issues or even misanthropy outside of Green issues and animal rights..though companion animals rarely were on Sarah’s radar as much as non metaphoric chickens, pigs, cows etc. Sarah wasn’t much of a catlady in terms of interacting with the cats who associated with her. Something cats understood and approved of.
Sarah sometimes looked at the state of earth unhappily and wondered how much she could have in common with a species that wrought such destruction. Over the years Sarah’s brain felt like earth. Sarah wondered if her brain were allowed to recover would its resilience mean these morons took that as a blank check to destroy earth and brains further?
Myopic. A parallel track was essential and the state should understand that locally
Sarah did not like France’s Chance and did not want a small green space in an urban jungle to continue to be destroyed.
It was an abortion and it was past time Sarah’s real world govt understood and started the process of a safe abortion with complaint filing. Leave in working things like marijuana legalization alone sans rubber stamps and things complaints would be filed over.

No real world lacks the catlady complainant and that would just be unmapped terrain. The counter to Larry page’s gross drivel was places where life would continue with only real normal friction but not an influencer and gamer filled predatory hell which would escalate to a point where “boys will be boys”, parasitic, unscientific “development economics” would finally send officials to prison as Sarah was human not an animal or earth and would respond more intelligibly faster.
Earth has been sending the same message but these brainiacs did not seem to get it . Sen Whitehouse and Adam MacKay get it.

Stop. Abort. Rosemary’s Baby will be aborted.
Satan was less the issue than “Sam”.
Halt.


Sarah needed the govt to understand something. Pensioners and their families were not sources of oil to rearrange.
It is not only noise pollution. It is the artificiality. And the danger. No one signed up for a nuisance interactive environment.
You would have to get permits like Madhav Gadgil or Tejas Thackeray or Hemant Kappanna would/
This is not China or Russia and having seen the effects of Si Valley, the pandemic, wet markets, wetware markets and Meninistan, it would not fly nor be popular.
One person is already dead. Poor data hygiene, the NSO crap etc is lame. Plausible deniability and all sided corrupt bs won’t work.

Let Sarah be. It is only 15 years and one death. Don’t make it 16, 17 etc.
It is your job to clean up these messes quietly but democratically and honestly.
Don’t throw away quality that can be a credit to you for unsustainable cheap “oil” and embarassing entertainment.
This will always be a quiet Green place or a war zone. Never a sweatshop as home Healthcare or A sideshow and complaints are on teh horizon, filed with the care needed to be sustainable. I cannot afford this thought Sarah.

It was as quiet as in days of yore. Sybil finally felt peace was at hand.
Her govt had probably gotten the message and she was her old thorny self. She had established communication with a Jewish journalist (Sasha Grinwine), a deep Green journalist (Frost Ketchup) and possibly an ai critic (Ned Patron) and Present Affairs Magazine - Sybil was very cryptic.

It was extremely useful as Sybil was not ashamed of her views but did not want to talk about them or other tacit humanist sympathies of various kinds that could never be useful for SuckerTurd or Creepani’s awful bulkscale which would maliciously lump Sybil with someone on the left Sybil could not comprehend who would later said stuff like MeToo hysteria confirming to Sybil that a left that ignored earth and women’s rights was closer to Creepstein than to anything real.

Sybil was on a messageboard which was a good testing ground to return to her old status as the person in the bus who is not a good person to approach with the Milgram experiment. Sybil trusted the users of the board and thought they were a good example of normal life where people of different types outside the batshit crazy carried on with their lives.

Sybil finally envisioned a life of peace where now a larger group (BUT NOT GROWING) understood her eccentricities enough to casually recognize the odd catlady and without much interest return to their - their..that whole sensory effect they induced in Sybil.

But Sybil had seen many an atrocious horror movie (which was what the entirety of the last 15 years) and knew this time around that that was when it all went to shit.

But if you could never keep things from her going to shit, they still did not have to be this hellish. Sybil knew well that her old admins definitely tried to screw over the Green, women’s libber left. Even they couldn’t be that obtuse.
And Sybil remembering the whole knew peace lay in the kind of not for entertainment or social media or experiments encounter with the real world that would program an unforgettable “recoil from a hot stove” learning experience.

Afterall Sybil was high in animal instinct but not an animal. It did not have to be menacing or uncomfortable but the internet would not bleed into the real world exactly once in some places, cause irreversible damage and then glorify the worst of its dynamics.

Nuh-uh. Sybil had no use for lightweight bs or theatre. Mockery fell light on Sybil’s hide. It even told Sybil a lot about the people.

Sybil was more interested in what made people truly cool and those were things that were slow and delicate but cool.

There was no absolute safety. But the hell Sybil had traipsed through made things look about as hopeful as a professional pessimist could expect.

The internet would not bleed into the real world this time and instead the real world would enter the internet.

Abortion seemed likely as govts and the private sector finally understood the hogs and piggies thing and understood that slimy edtech was just not gonna happen.
Not in Sybil’s yard, devices and home.

They can take it out of SuckerTurd or Creepani’s gold underwear fund. Sybil had seen this measly basket of tactics which did not work outside: showbiz, politics and the media..

Communication was easy.

When you hadn’t been shoved into a box built by SuckerTurd.

The communists who have been in office for 10 truly hellish years during which I lost my mom lost embarassingly.
To be clear, they were absolutely probthe worst forms of industrial pollution, environmental destruction and never saw a sleazy business they didn’t like. Madhav Gadgil called them out.

I hope this entire project is dismantled and shut down immediately, no further parasitic studies etc

I feel real hope of a normal, quiet life, but one where I don’t have to accomodate shitty ai and bots, rather than have them just shut down.
I really hope I can restart my life.

The use of my street was so malicious. I didn’t feel safe in my own home and hospitals and the street were places where this disgusting, non consensual shit was ongoing and endless testing would be insisted on or they could claim I was a bot, targeted individual, schizophrenic who refuses treatment. It was pure harassment and gaslighting.
Nudge theory style disgusting “mimes” in the grocery store. “Community policing”

Terrible ideas stupid people should not be given as a blank check.

I am hopeful finally of proper complaints with due process for them and certainly I will skip the bs. I am the complainant. I won’t be stressed about these bullies anymore.

It was not left or right. There were bound to be people who wear either self serving. Du is full of impassioned activists.

That’s not politics irl especially these business deal cutting types. They are like Andreessen or Cuban. Or bullies like Vinod Khosla.
I am filing complaints about the whole as a neutral party. I agreed to take a mentor and a few scientists and my onc on the system of trust.
Not a creepy network.

It is quiet and I hope my brain and this small real ecosystem, including the few mj and vegan cos, some very minimal, scientific not intelligently designed garbagw (no agents, no geo engineering, no reactive environments, no pokemon, no sidewalks lab, no neom,


I will escalate harassment charges if any of it continues. This is not a shop.
No means no.
Don’t let the idiots already mired drag in more it force this etc. That city I was in was so crass.
Here you have to get permits.

Sil cannot shill a sweatshop metaphoric vaccine. I am just returning my brain to it’s original ways and I interact normally.
I don’t want to engage ever with ads, the private sector, gaming etc.
I am strict about real life and its not real life but harasssment enabled by the state when it used all this. No music, stomp etc.

Please just go away. No. Marijuana’s status is changing. I am overtly a MeToo complainant alleging corruption, malpractice, misconduct and harassment by this entire vile crew here.

Real life isn’t just what misogynists and tech want. Just stop. I have forgiven enough with known people I don’t even like.I don’t want to hear it.
There is no Streisand effect.

I am pleased today. Neither the creepy silence nor this horrible misogynistic..it was hell
No.

Last edited Tue May 5, 2026, 12:20 PM - Edit history (4)

I was reading one of the few second rate pieces I have seen in a publication I typically like. I chucked it halfway through as the kind of boredom that uninteresting trainwrecks

I have stared at trainwrecks. But it is usually the kind of stuff considered cool in these rather daft societies that are cooking themselves to death.

I never went to an American highschool and as far as I can tell as an outsider “winners” and “losers”..it is all pretty boring and tiresome. It degrades one to engage with it.

But the real reason it cannot be ignored is that I lost close to 15 years of work and one person is dead. There was no implied consent ever..ever.
I am not going to dignify bs.



People who eschewed IRB protocols going back at least to Sept 2011 are in no position to double down on this bs. What I saw before that at a cafe at a med school looked kinda lame and annoying. By the time that poor data hygiene, gossip etc had invaded the hospital where my mom was dying of cancer it was no longer merely annoying. When it came on to my street it was no longer something the whole could disengage from with attempts a child can see through- mind reading and all.
The same people I am going to file complaints against have every reason to yet again misrepresent this.
But without the ear shattering noise pollution and other aggression in the real world it won’t work.
I am filing misconduct, malpractice and harassment allegations.
I will initiate them as soon as I finish a paper that was stalled by this parasitic encroachment.


Today I finally have hope that this vile govt here going out of office means the whole will be dismantled, all “studies” shut down (such worthless stuff..the inferior quality of the science was the biggest stressor. Because that is the only real..watchamacallit. These are lame things with tech and “he said, she saids” where no absolute exists.
This is shoddy science. The minute you try to induct someone who isn’t going to be inducted into your bs.

You needed to explicitly ask permission and when you don’t bsing about a mental illness epidemic to fund second rate people whose main goal is to prevent misconduct and malpractice allegations or shepard them down tried and tested channels that obscure the reality.

I did not sign up for this. I would not sign up for it. I don’t see bullies etc. Well okay yeah bullies. But the real bullies are people like the billionaires.
This petty gossip type’s role is to distract with mini scams from big scam which is that it simply is not good work.

Its premise is a total lie. And it fails the minute someone says - which I tried from 2011.

This is not good work and it is fatiguing. And I actually think the butts of jokes are more interesting than these people with an emptiness inside them nothing can fill. Though that is puttiny stuff in their language.
But the real issue is that shitty admins etc cannot deflect attention to bullshit internet trivia ignoring the rollout of technology into living spaces and like this.

It is not inevitable. As the approach seems to be “Yeah we are just doing this.” I will respond in kind. You are not. If anything it may work to clean up some stuff that was always shitty.

I am not going to get distracted by this. I want to know why my mom went off metformin. It was not unconnected with the start of what smelt again like liability culture which takes credit for success and no blame for failures.

I am filing malpractice allegations in psychiatry and misconduct in human subject research and harassment allegations about poor data hygiene. If you want a libertarian playground with some bullshit FB contagion style studies this is not the place.
Anyway nice try:

It is quiet and the recent move of marijuana to schedule 3 status in the US and the election results that came out Monday give me hope for the first time since Oct 2011.
This was lame. Who the hell mixes hard science with such drivel.
Good social science isn’t like this.

It really caters to the lcd that considers Ariely,
Gino, Haidt, Pinker etc science.
But I feel optimistic finally about my jog tonight and work tomorrow.

This is a place where gangrapes, acid attacks and cyberstalking are common.


You need to stop fighting misconduct, malpractice and harassment allegations and take the smaller penalty.
Don’t try to invert this again out there and don’t pile on.

It is quieter on the whole and isn’t like a constant assault/ but at 7:30 pm another noise polluting brainless misogynistic parasite went by on his bike.

It is official. I am filing criminal charges in some cases where people knowingly used this street with the knowledge of people whose job it was to shut this down. Especially starting from 2023.
Don’t try to use second rate narratives about bullying and stuff from high school.
This is about money and space. The misogyny and the bullying only work to enable the pillage and plunder.
This stuff is not my strength. It never was.
I tried to bail in Oct 2011 when it dawned on me that something second rate was ongoing and I couldn’t.

Today I don’t want to only bail. I will file complaints.
I encourage anyone who is acceptable to come to me with information I need.
Your enemy’s enemy aka I am your friend whatever your faith or deal if you are honest and decent and hate these guys.
I will also go via the system.

This internet stuff and people stuff is not really my thing except civilized DUers and civilized scientists aka not the type of rabble you find at Stanford, MIt etc. That Prof Ryan Williams and Paul Ehrlich and Prof Dirzo aside those two schools mainly exist to annoy people into insanity. And that might make a good show for the online who have way too much time and make a show of

I have way too much time. But I wanted to spend it on stuff I find fun not one upmanship with people whose minds are a torture to decode as they are so damn empty.
Is this what that version of highschool does? I get why even twisted politics are interesting as they have real world effects beyond mere annoyance.
This is largely a nails on chalkboard crew since at least 2010-2011.

Anyway I am going to clean up now. Finish my paper. I was supposed to start on Monday but that money this din was not yet gone and then the election results came in and there is a quiet over the city after 10 years of this corrupt and nightmarish govt.
I will resume my workout. Hopefully that was the last of it. I am going to push for a real crackdown.
I am sorry. Not because I care. But because it will be..I am not looking forward to it.

But it is peaceful now/ I will finish my paper and clean up. In a formal system without gaslighting tests and observation and new people with no stake I will be credible and I am open to some minimal non conflict.
But this was not good. It was not in my head and cannot be normalized. Weed looks en route to being legal without creepy rubber stamps.
This will go the way of Outcome Healthcare, Elizabeth Holmes etc. As for traffic studies etc

It is clear that too much experimentation that is outright misconduct occurred between 2010 and the present in two countries and I am filing complaints/
I will write down clear narrative. I may post some of it here.
But for now I want to finish up and clean up so I can get back into professional drag and destroy this worthless experiment and see that every last complaint is filed.
My mentor and an adjacent annoying lab will be okay. Merely being silly and annoying are not misconduct though certainly not the best fit for frayed nerves. Idiots who read Freakonomics and think that is brilliant.

It is really hard to know how to talk in a way intelligible to people who are about as deep as you assess them to be and yeah Carlin can go and look for universes in the eyes of these pills.
I don’t want to.

All I have wanted to do was file complaints and I will. It is not surprising that that would be hampered. That needs to stop.
I do not know what inane pattern this would fit in the eyes of the types of persons who see some of themselves in this.
Whereas all I ever saw was the types of people one avoids. I didn’t see universal human dynamics etc. Beyond that I rarely like people. And there were almost no people of the type I would like in this and that didn’t seem safe to admit.
https://www.quantamagazine.org/a-new-type-of-neuroplasticity-rewires-the-brain-after-a-single-experience-20260424/

This is the key..not quiet but this hell started in 2011. I entered that hell as normal average postdoc struggling with the difficulties of that path. I was a wreck by the time I left 8 months later. It was just difficult after.
The last 10 years of this vile govt.

I am pretty sure this will be dismantled now. All our corrupt cm’s cutouts etc were gone.
I can now return to my July 2011 self. Last July this viciously ramped up.
Today it was quiet and pleasant. A few residual creeps on the street aside.
This street (0000F5D7) is a crime scene at this point and trying to bs is no use,
I will be back on du after this paper is over

This has caused a lot of damage to my health,
I was healthy and normal in 2011. This shitty expt wrecked my health.
It is not my mentors fault or that of a scientist adjacent from a foul lab I took an instant dislike to. I hate people who read Freakonomics
I am not joking.

It is impossible to talk to these ppl. They think paranoia is qanon. It is so disingenuous.
“Paranoia” is correctly pegging a pi as the type who outside hard science reads Freakonomics and has a specific annoying worldview.
Well if not precisely Freakonomics in that range. Harriri, Bill Gates’ book list and to such a person ..well I can’t get into everything wrong with such persons except ..they are better than RFK etc
But still.
Science is hard as is. Without consorting with the type of shallow person who likes Haidt, Pinker etc. It is why a couple of writers aside I like Current Affairs, Yasha etc
There is something very bleak about anything beyond the routine with that type
How can anyone read the mind of the type of person who thinks that is the fix for anything

And with this creepy harassing local govt gone I can start.

I will get go back to normal and finish this and prepare to file complaints anonymously.
I will be nice I promise. Except with the creeps who flooded my street. No quarter there.

The internet has the dynamics of a tabloid a lot and places like Stanford/harvard have a lot of that dynamic (that tacky prison expt) in spades except when they make science repellant. Its a good object lesson on this economy where good civilian hard science is made so impossibly hard that only the kids of total douchebags can even aspire to it and whether you are someone who likes this other lightweight junk or not via slander about mental illness (to attack your credibility as a complainant) or distraction with this criminally creepy stalkerish health destroying crass drivel.


Thjs is not cleaning etc. It is invasive
Well I support my mentor (okay I support his wife and so I have to tolerate him..we are past all dishonesty. I really liked my mentors wife..a decent woman and so one has to put up with him, Ted tech talks/Freakonomics and all..I like to minimize conflict and so it is convenient that he is married to such a decent woman) and have listed all the decent people over and over.

But I will clock into irisblue’s thread once a day. Never cared for that AA crap. These guys overuse addiction models probably to avoid accepting that their main service is space grabs and annoyance. This fabric should be destroyed.
I had no idea there were these many silly and tiresome people in science and they need to stop using the tired spiels of internet companies to cross boundaries with unfriendly strangers.
I can always tell when they try narratives that really silly and gossipy people lap up to distract from the tech creeps and the real issue.

So not this time. This is not my forte but with a proper official and police and other authorities I will stay on track and not legitimise anything above the acceptable stuff from 2008. It’s time these laws and regulations were updated rather than myopic rot.

In fact, I should retrain normal ways starting tomorrow as this is a credible explanation to my mind for a real change being feasible now shutting this whole project and all its creepy offshoots down.
And I can prepare to be a different person ..well the same person I was prior July 2011 to be credible to a new set of non trumpy people with no ties to any oft jus in the future to ensure this never happens again and Lina Khan meets MeToo style strict rules are established so publicly funded scientists, patients, homeowners etc are not forced into this predatory landscape or exploited and total abortion options must exist.