Are they both 100% disabled?

but they are, so probably. She uses a walker and has a bad heart. He still drives and does all the cooking, cleaning, etc. but hobbles slowly and is a three-time cancer survivor.


Maybe this is it, scroll down to "aid and attendance" --

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Veteran%27s_pension_(United_States)

Respectfully so you do not offend them, but it might be good to check. There are so many scams out there.

Here's the application and the Veterans Legal aid would be a good place go start to verify that this situation is ok - https://veteranslegalaid.org/request-for-assistance/

for 2 years until she died at age 98.

I am a veteran and a widow of a veteran. I am bookmarking this. Thank you so much.

Spouses of vets have a second list which does get drawn from, but at a slower rate - 2 or 3 to one.

Each county is supposed to have an office for veteran affairs. You can go there for information. Or the American Legion also offers eligibility information and assistance with processing applications.

I would ask about the waiting lists for your state's long term care facilities. Ask what happens if someone is registered for a bed but declines when the time comes? I'm sure there would be no penalty, but is the position reserved near the front of the line, placed to the back of the line or (least likely) not allowed to enter the list for a period of time?

The point is, at 97, there may be an emergency.

Finances: Given that they have already been awarded money, cost to enter the VA facility would be a percentage of their income, minus expenses. In my mother's case, I (meaning she) had to write a check for $1,400 per month. That was because she had rental income, SS, and pension income.

Still, it was better than trying to figure out where a $7,000 monthly assisted living fee was going to come from.

The money will go toward hiring household help. If my stepdad dies first, my mom would have to move somewhere, but given their health situations, that is not the expected turn of events. Of course, we never know.

He gets an additional $750 a month in his disability deposit because I have to cook his food, clean his clothes, and help him get in and out of the bath tub. It does not matter who takes care of a disabled veteran, hired help or a spouse.