It does take a while to adjust to them not being with us, take care.

Right now, Madoc is mooching cheese off of me. That was always Sian's favorite bedtime activity. As soon as I walked towards the kitchen she'd come running, jump up on the counter and make sure I sliced enough to share with her. Same thing in the morning when I'd get a bagel ready to toast. She loved cream cheese so I'd give her just a tiny bit. When she finished, she'd sit in front of me and STARE me into submission, which means I'd swipe some cream cheese up on my finger and let her lick it clean.

A friend referred to Sian as a precious and funny little monkey butt. That does make me smile.

I still think I see her up in the bedroom hallway and just can't wrap my mind around what happened, and how fast she was gone. It's been a horrible Summer because of those damn fleas.

And at times heard her meows and knocking on my bedroom door to be let in. My husband also admitted to me when he got up in the morning to go to work he heard her meow for breakfast.

My son is is very attached to his cat and through him I have become a cat lover even though I’m allergic to cats

Hang in there. Love your posts. And gives me some levity whenever I’m looking through DU.

Blessings Sian.

I thought about you all day today. I'm so glad you checked in so that all of us can offer our support and share your memories. She was a very special little girl.

I actually had a family member (by marriage) DISOWN ME, yesterday, because I guess Sian's death was her tipping point with me. Apparently the epic level flea situation is all my fault because I'm not doing enough to save kittens. She's a bit of a nut case, to begin with. The kind of self righteous vegan who loves to shame non-vegans, an anti-vaxxer and self designated expert on animal rights and rescues. She let me know of my disownment 'situation' via FB Messenger, right after we had finished Sian's burial. I immediately blocked her on all social media and my phone. Somehow I doubt she expected that. Also let the rest of the family know what she wrote. We were all at our wits end with her, anyway, but for her to pull that nonsense while I was still in shock is not going to bode well for her.

It's a good thing to know because she and her husband, who is related to me, are beneficiaries in my estate so I'm going to rectify that, ASAP.

You aren't doing enough???!? The time and care and love you give to those kittens is inspiring. Your family member is a nutcase indeed! Plus, what a cruel streak a person must have to hit you with that garbage on the same day Sian bid you farewell. Buh-bye, nutcase.

and you left us wonderful memories of Sian. If I could I would send you a Tibetan singing bowl to bring calmness. “Embrace tranquility, anywhere.”

None of this is in any way your fault, and I feel it was cruel of your relative to blame you on top of your devastating loss. Sometimes things just happen. Some people aren't able to accept that and blame others to give themselves someone to be angry with so they can focus on that rather than feel the sorrow and pain inside. She shouldn't have said what she said. She's done a lot of damage to not only any sort relationship with you, but also everyone in your family. I feel very sorry for her husband. Hugs, my friend. I'm so sorry she hurt you. You are a good and loving mom. Take care of yourself and those precious kidcats.

Said a prayer for the universe to surround you with love and hold you safe in it's hands

Sorry to hear about your relative treating you so badly.

Just know your DU family cares for you and knows you did all you could do for Sian.

I think it's been 3 weeks since I lost my senior cat and I'm struggling. I lost my dog in February, too. They're such a huge part of our lives and our daily routines that there's just a void. I know I turn corners and expect to see them there. Anyway be kind to yourself and love on your boys. I know my younger cats are more social (clingy? ) since they lost their big sister.

I also understand the tendency to blame yourself but DON'T. You are a devoted and excellent cat mom and Sian does NOT want you to blame yourself. You'll see her again.