Mental Health Support

Ziggysmom

(3,635 posts) Fri Nov 22, 2024, 04:51 AM Nov 22

Dementia or ?

My husband 75 (M) is currently hospitalized due to a GI bleed; two ulcers were diagnosed during an upper GI. It’s 3 AM and his nurse calls me, he is confused and yelling in the background, “Call the police”. He has severe COPD and needs oxygen 24/7. He is refusing to allow his nurse to apply his nasal cannula oxygen tubing. The nurses are worried as his O2 saturation has gone from 95 to 80.

When home with me he has been having these angry and confused episodes more frequently. Once his O2 level drops below 90 he is difficult to deal with. Now the GI bleed has left him anemic so his brain is getting even less oxygen.

I fear he may need nursing home placement soon. He is extremely afraid of that and will fight me all the way. I’m contacting an attorney later today regarding guardianship.

Anyone have any suggestions? I fear I am sleep deprived and not thinking clearly.

5 replies

= new reply since forum marked as read

Highlight:

Dementia or ? (Original Post) Ziggysmom Nov 22 OP

I do not have any answers to that question, but I am holding you snd him in light and love. irisblue Nov 22 #1

Thank you, Dear. As if aging is not hard enough on the body, it is truly frightening when Ziggysmom Nov 22 #2

Convince him that his best hope avoiding/delaying nursing home is getting well which means following instructions Bernardo de La Paz Nov 22 #3

Going through this sort of thing with my 94 yr old dad, you did the right thing by going quickly to ... marble falls Nov 22 #4

I think going to the lawyer is wise XanaDUer2 Nov 22 #5

irisblue

(34,411 posts)

1. I do not have any answers to that question, but I am holding you snd him in light and love.

Reply to Ziggysmom (Original post)

Fri Nov 22, 2024, 04:56 AM

Nov 22

I am so sorry.

Ziggysmom

(3,635 posts)

2. Thank you, Dear. As if aging is not hard enough on the body, it is truly frightening when

Reply to irisblue (Reply #1)

Fri Nov 22, 2024, 05:32 AM

Nov 22

illness affects the mind of a loved one.

Bernardo de La Paz

(51,248 posts)

3. Convince him that his best hope avoiding/delaying nursing home is getting well which means following instructions

Reply to Ziggysmom (Original post)

Fri Nov 22, 2024, 05:42 AM

Nov 22

Wishing you both well.

Convince him as only you know how. The sooner he gets well again and the stronger, more healthy he gets the greater his chance of avoiding or delaying nursing homes. You and he can both know that and can believe it.

The logical next step in accomplishing that is following nurses and doctors orders. Get him on this line of thinking and remind him as necessary so that he internalizes it.

Between you and us, it will also help him stave off any further dementia.

I would also consult professionals as to what degree to discuss and address with him directly and caringly his changing behaviour. On an urgent basis, even 15 minutes would help you a lot.

marble falls

(62,518 posts)

4. Going through this sort of thing with my 94 yr old dad, you did the right thing by going quickly to ...

Reply to Ziggysmom (Original post)

Fri Nov 22, 2024, 07:54 AM

Nov 22

... to the attorney. This will not be easy, but it will have a good conclussuon.

The most important person you can save is you. One way or another, he will be taken care of: you take care of you.

XanaDUer2

(14,602 posts)

5. I think going to the lawyer is wise

Reply to Ziggysmom (Original post)

Fri Nov 22, 2024, 11:51 AM

Nov 22

I don't know the medical part, but holding you both in light

Reply to this discussion