I don't even know where to start with this. Rec'd.

ty

First time posting in this group, although I read daily.

I have a 12 year old daughter. She looks at herself in the mirror and all she can see is her blemishes and imperfections. How do I teach her to love herself, build up her self-esteem, when she is constantly bombarded with these images of "beauty" in every media outlet to which she is exposed?

Very frustrating for me, and hard for young women, these days. I think it was easier when I was younger, because we did not have TV 24h a day, plus internet, plus music videos etc...

Especially in puberty...

It is still heartbreaking to see her staring at herself in a mirror critiquing her every flaw. When I tell her she is beautiful, I get "Mom, you have to say that". It is very difficult parenting a girl these days.

Since it happened to me for the first time as an adult 3 yrs ago, and it was professionally applied, the memory is pretty fresh in my mind.

I wanted to look the way I looked when I was made up, not the real me with flaws, etc. One of the times I was made up, I had an acne outbreak and I was concerned about how it would make me look. The person applying makeup smiled at me, brought out some sort of makeup application instrument that looked like a gun, took it to the problem areas and then even knowing exactly where the problem was and using a lighted mirror, I could not see it.

Some woman, I dont even remember who now, once said, wow, you look so different with makeup, obviously meaning I look so much better and she was less appreciative of how the real me looked.

This is one of those issues I get pretty well from personal experience. Makeup, airbrushing, unreasonable expectations of how you should look, all of those are incredibly destructive things.

I can't wear makeup now. I had eczema all over my eye lids...

It was the Catholic school version of sex ed at that time. How to keep your skin clear, how to apply makeup, how to walk. I think there may have been an actual pamphlet thrown in at some point talking about menstruation and sex.

I did not start wearing makeup consistently until I was 40. I needed a little bit of something to hide the bags under my eyes!

A person that is confident and loving of who they are radiates physical (mental and emotional) attraction. What feels better: To love oneself for who they are, "flaws" and all. Or, to feel like you have to hide who you really are because you feel ugly or not "beautiful enough"?

Even when I was four decades younger. Worse, I think, is judging women's intellectual and political worth by their appearance.

Who gives a flying whatever if Hillary Clinton has gained or lost a few pounds, or if her ankles are swollen? It's what she says and does that matters. And Ann Coulter isn't ugly because of her appearance: it's her words that are repulsive (having said that, I must admit I once captioned Coulter as a praying mantis. I thought it captured her personality perfectly).

I was going to post something on this topic the other day, but had to really think about how to post it.

I have a great problem with perfection...it is impossible to obtain and a fools quest. We in society are now so use to seeing what is fake as real that I worry about this particular brand of social engineering.

It is very unhealthy and sends the message...'you too can be perfect! Just like this CGI'd model that doesn't exist!'




Very bad message imo. Besides the pictures on the left are natural beauty...the pictures on the right are bastardized unnatural images.

Are we really a society so obsessed with perfection that we have fooled ourselves into believing it is possible?

Prefect beauty? Only found in the bottom of a jar?

Balderdash!!!