reticence. She became self assured in an all women environment. At the time some of my coworkers asked why she went to an all girls school since she was so pretty!

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Nothing builds independence like knowing you're on your own. It was a five hour drive.

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Your Mother was obviously brilliant.

Tore up my application for a college.
That was not my local community college.
I was working after school and had to go get a money order to send with the application.
The only reason my mother signed the application was because my friend went to the same college and her mother persuaded my mother it was OK.

I was the first person on either side of my family to graduate from college.

🙌🏻 🙌🏻 🙌🏻

Its really hard to believe that there is/was a time when women did not have autonomy. My Mom taught me to always be able to stand on my own two feet. Kudos to you for following your path!!

They want their son or daughter to go to THEIR school & get into THEIR field and marry the rich guy/girl.

Beaver college changed its name to Arcadia in 2001.
The college took substantial abuse for years over the Beaver name. I still think it was a shame the name had to change.

It was such a shame brilliant women like yourself had to trick their families into letting them be successful.

I first took logic classes in highschool. I continued them in college. I agree with you , logic classes opened up my thinking and helped structure my thoughts.

While he didn't actively continue to try to control my life, there was an undercurrent where my achievements were not fully appreciated.

. . . did Sweet Briar turn you into a lady?

My daughter was accepted at Sweet Briar but opted for a small Alabama state university where her professors took time with students. She came out a dedicated liberal social justice warrior.

At least not initially. I was resistant only b/c I didn't want to become an elitist.

As I matured, I found that the pursuit of high standards didn't make one an elitist. I adopted a professional demeanor, tact, restraint, and patience. I'm certain I picked that up from Sweet Briar.

If anything, I've annoyed (male) employers who found me to be more intelligent and a better critical thinker than they were.

Lady? Probably, but not according to the generic standards.

Sweet Briar was a small school. I had classes with as few as 3 other students and some with 50. The professors and students got to know each other quite well. Matter of fact, I returned to attend the memorial for my freshman English prof, who gave me a C-minus, due to my continual respect for him.

Eleven years later I broke the gender barrier at Washington & Lee. Ironically, got both my BA and my MRS there. Landed an awesome feminist husband against all odds. LOL!

One of my favorite people is a Sweet Briar alum who married one of my husband's fraternity brothers. Possibly the sassiest, badassiest, smartest woman I've ever met.

I love your story and so appreciate you sharing it!!

After getting both my BS (1973)and Master's (1975 in a male dominated field) from UCLA despite getting married in 1972, my mother had the nerve to tell me I would always be able to get a job as a secretary. When I asked her if that meant my brother, who had just gotten his MD, would always be able to get a job as an orderly, that shut her up.

I divorced the first husband after seven years. Left the second after 32 years before he blew his brains out.

I have often wondered if I'd followed my heart and never married how different my life might have been.

You were very lucky to have such a wise and supportive mother.

She loves it.

My parents never thought to encourage me to go to college. I would be the first in my family to graduate college on either side. It just didn’t occur to them, I was a girl in the south. Dad encouraged me to be an artist or go into a number of traditional women’s fields. He was not controlling. They did tell my 2 year older brother that he either had to go into the military or college, his choice. I always had the strong feeling that I never wanted to rely on a husband or anyone else to support me so I went to an engineering school. My brother and I both graduated on the same day me in the morning and him in the evening. Both engineering degrees. Dad and mom were very proud and said so many times. Dad later told me he just never imagined the things I chose to do were possible for me but was very proud that I did.

Dad was adament about his 4 daughters going to college, but was kind of your dad's mirror image. He wanted us independent, and NOT needing a man to take care of us. He and mom were the "greatest generation" who both had the talent to go to college, but not the money, and there was that pesky war to deal with. He started talking to me about how important college was when I was 5...no exaggeration. And mom was right there with him. BUT...there was no way we could go "away" to school. We had to commute and live at home. It was the 60's, the sexual revolution was in full swing, and he was not about to have our education interrupted by a pregnancy. (I guess you could only have sex at night, in bed. ) Fortunately for me, there was a local liberal arts/teacher's college that had exactly what I needed, was highly recommended by my coaches and counselors (I was a jock, phys. ed. major) and as a state school, dirt cheap so I could pay for it with summer jobs.

My experience was a lot like yours...college those days was an eye-opening experience, when our professors demanded critical thought. There was no way you could go into a classroom discussion with fuzzy or emotional thinking. It was an experience that formed so many of us.

But actually, the reason I got started on this life story was that we may have grown up in the same area! I grew in Cherry Hill, NJ, and went to what was then Glassboro State College, now Rowan University...when you endow a college with $500 million, they'll change the name!

So much character, both you and your mother.

Free community college for everyone would turn more folks into Dems.

me, I enlisted that same year

My father disinherited me and my two siblings when died.

While he didn’t leave anything to Sweet Briar, one-quarter of the estate went to Mom’s college, Barnard. I can live with that.