I meant to say in the OP that it is highly possible I've met other trans people who find no need to announce their trans status to me.

I do know, that I know of, one trans woman, and I am likewise fascinated, would love to ask lots of questions but know that those questions would probably be rude and intrusive. She will let me know whatever appropriate information I need. And honestly, if I never learn anything other than her name, and what she does for a living, and the fact that she's trans, that really is all I need to know.

I saw a man immediately. An older friend keeps after months) referring to “her”. Today she used the feminized form of his name. My older friend is one of the kindest sweetest persons I ever knew.

Just think if a welling meaning person reacts like that, think how many malevolent persons have said much worse.

The US is really spiritually lost. At least 40% of it is.

It helps me a lot that when I was 20 years old I went to work as an airline ticket agent at Washington National Airport. About half of the men I worked with were gay, although in the beginning I did not know that, as they were all not public about their orientation. I am so glad I knew them. Not only because individually they were wonderful men, but more to the point that I got to understand being "different". Alas, far too many of them died in the early years of AIDS.

About a decade ago I worked the information desk at my local hospital. It was located right outside the gift shop, which was staffed by volunteers. They typically worked a 3 hour shift one day a week so I had the joy of meeting lots of the volunteers. On Wednesday evenings, there was Robert. It was obvious to me from our very first hello that he was gay. We'd chat, because I could walk into the gift shop when things were slow and immediately return to the information desk if needed. Anyway, after a while he invited me to his house on a Saturday for coffee. He then informed me he was gay. He was a bit concerned that I'd be thinking of him as a potential date, especially because were are close in age. I laughed, and told him I'd figured it out right away. We are still friends, typically get together once a week or so for lunch.

A while back we went out to dinner together. He'd made the reservation in his name, and when we showed up the hostess called me "Mrs. Moore." I was actually delighted that we were taken for a married couple, even though we are not.

Here's something else that may be important. Both of the trans people I know are connected to the science fiction world. They are both writers. Trust me, that world is incredibly open and embracing of differences. I am so very glad I am part of that s-f world.

I had this woman in a class in Chicago -- absolutely gorgeous, dressed to the nines, with perfect hair and makeup. I felt kinda shabby in my traditional teaching gear of khaki shirt, sweater, and flat shoes, though I was more formally dressed than anyone else, male or female. I made my usual remarks at the beginning of class, thanking the women in the room for keeping me company in my mostly male world.

Gorgeous stuck around with some questions after class one night, and we got to chatting about this and that. She thanked me for treating her like the other women in the class. That's when I realized that she was trans.

That is essentially just like my recent trans man being so pleased that he was referred to as "that gentleman." I think his transition is relatively recent. As I mentioned, a mutual friend though that we already knew each other, which we didn't.

From obvious to not so obvious. In my experience trans men seem to have an easier time for passing 100%.