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milestogo

(18,247 posts)
Tue Dec 24, 2024, 12:38 PM 19 hrs ago

Jets Fans Required To Sign NDA Before Leaving Stadium



EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ—With security checkpoints having been set up near every exit, New York Jets fans were reportedly stopped and asked to sign nondisclosure agreements Sunday before leaving MetLife Stadium. “By signing this document, you are agreeing that you will never discuss the details of what happened on that field today with anyone outside of the venue,” said a legal representative for the Jets, adding that none of the tens of thousands of fans in attendance would be allowed to exit the premises unless they accepted the terms of the rigid confidentiality clause, agreeing never to mention the words “awful,” “embarrassing,” “loss,” or “Aaron Rodgers” during the offseason and in perpetuity thereafter.

“The results of this game are privileged information that can never get out to the general public without doing great harm to owners, players, and—frankly—you people, who have chosen to be fans of such a humiliating football team. So it’s for your benefit as well as ours that no one knows what happened here today. If any results of that pathetic display you just witnessed leak to the general public, rest assured you will all be held financially liable for any sports bloopers that may result.” At press time, the Federal Communications Commission had been served with an injunction to blur out the scores of televised Jets games for the remainder of the season.

https://theonion.com/jets-fans-required-to-sign-nda-before-leaving-stadium/
32 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
Jets Fans Required To Sign NDA Before Leaving Stadium (Original Post) milestogo 19 hrs ago OP
I'd ask for some hush money before signing anything newdeal2 19 hrs ago #1
Yup be sure to request the Rodgers Rate for a little extra to cover the pain and suffering Blue Owl 12 hrs ago #27
Lololol! Drum 19 hrs ago #2
The Saints needed that too, but they were on the road, rzemanfl 19 hrs ago #3
Will the Jets be on a milk carton next? Sneederbunk 19 hrs ago #4
I had to check the link! niyad 19 hrs ago #5
Same here. These days weird news are everywhere. Dave Bowman 19 hrs ago #7
location of Grocery Stores using Brown Paper Bags close to the stadium Oneear 19 hrs ago #6
I'm hoping many people refused to sign. PoindexterOglethorpe 19 hrs ago #8
Can they be required to do this and if so how? efhmc 17 hrs ago #20
Exactly. They are leaving the stadium PoindexterOglethorpe 11 hrs ago #30
Can you Rebl2 10 hrs ago #32
They need to be sued for our pain and suffering. Quiet Em 19 hrs ago #9
Alright. You got me. You happy, now???? lindysalsagal 19 hrs ago #10
Almost got me! boonecreek 18 hrs ago #11
When you're a Jet, you're a Jet all the way Backseat Driver 17 hrs ago #19
How about boonecreek 15 hrs ago #23
Woody Johnson bmichaelh 18 hrs ago #12
OMG that was well played.... mike_c 18 hrs ago #13
OK, that got a chuckle... Wounded Bear 18 hrs ago #14
Paying to view, in person, such an on-field atrocity such as the Jets flvegan 18 hrs ago #15
I actually felt relieved on seeing the onion link 0rganism 18 hrs ago #16
DAMMIT!! THEY STOLE THAT IDEA FROM THE GIANTS!!! AZ8theist 17 hrs ago #17
Agreed. edbermac 17 hrs ago #18
It's seriously getting harder to tell satire from reality these days! Initech 17 hrs ago #21
Ummm lonely bird 16 hrs ago #22
LOL CatWoman 15 hrs ago #24
Thanks for my laugh today. Xavier Breath 14 hrs ago #25
*refuses to sign it due to no lawyer to represent and protect me* sakabatou 13 hrs ago #26
Jets, Nets, & Mets equals DEBTS Blue Owl 12 hrs ago #28
I immediately smelled onions. 🧅🧅🧅🧅🧅🧅 usonian 12 hrs ago #29
🏈 that's too funny. underpants 10 hrs ago #31

Blue Owl

(54,910 posts)
27. Yup be sure to request the Rodgers Rate for a little extra to cover the pain and suffering
Tue Dec 24, 2024, 07:37 PM
12 hrs ago

rzemanfl

(30,300 posts)
3. The Saints needed that too, but they were on the road,
Tue Dec 24, 2024, 12:41 PM
19 hrs ago

in Green Bay and The Onion moved from Wisconsin to New York.

Oneear

(97 posts)
6. location of Grocery Stores using Brown Paper Bags close to the stadium
Tue Dec 24, 2024, 12:50 PM
19 hrs ago

I would have a run-on with something to have a Brown Bag cut out some eyes, and The NFL needs not to allow teams with losing Records to raise ticket sales and Food & Drink Prices, and the Owner can not take any money but to spend on Players and Gym Food for the Team

PoindexterOglethorpe

(26,838 posts)
30. Exactly. They are leaving the stadium
Tue Dec 24, 2024, 08:49 PM
11 hrs ago

and someone wants them to sign and NDA now?

Yeah, right.

Rebl2

(14,940 posts)
32. Can you
Tue Dec 24, 2024, 10:17 PM
10 hrs ago

imagine requiring thousands of angry fans to sign NDA as they leave the stadium? I don’t think so.
No this didn’t, nor will this ever happen. 🤣

Backseat Driver

(4,638 posts)
19. When you're a Jet, you're a Jet all the way
Tue Dec 24, 2024, 02:54 PM
17 hrs ago

from your first cigarette to your last dying day...

I claim fair use for all Jet fans...

bmichaelh

(642 posts)
12. Woody Johnson
Tue Dec 24, 2024, 01:49 PM
18 hrs ago

The owner of Jets is a Trump supporter and was appointed by Trump as ambassador to UK during his first term but not the next term.

He has an ego and wants to be addressed as Ambassador.

flvegan

(64,651 posts)
15. Paying to view, in person, such an on-field atrocity such as the Jets
Tue Dec 24, 2024, 01:58 PM
18 hrs ago

and then demanding I put in writing that I was guilty of same?

No thanks.

/s

Edited to add the /s, just in case.

0rganism

(24,752 posts)
16. I actually felt relieved on seeing the onion link
Tue Dec 24, 2024, 02:00 PM
18 hrs ago

I don't remember ever having that reaction to their material before.

We're headed to a very dark place indeed.

AZ8theist

(6,555 posts)
17. DAMMIT!! THEY STOLE THAT IDEA FROM THE GIANTS!!!
Tue Dec 24, 2024, 02:35 PM
17 hrs ago

All we ever got was a medium soda.......

lonely bird

(1,965 posts)
22. Ummm
Tue Dec 24, 2024, 03:36 PM
16 hrs ago

The Browns would like a word.

Cleveland has only had a football team for 4 years since they were brought back as an expansion team.

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